Hey Ladies

Intro:

There never was a city kid truer and bluer

There's more to me than you'll ever know

And I've got more hits than Sadaharu Oh

Tom Thumb, Tom Cushman or Tom Foolery

I date women on T.V.

with the help of Chuck Woolery

Words are flowing out just like the Grand Canyon

And I'm always out looking for a female companion

I threw the lasso around the tallest

one and dragged her to the crib

I took off her moccasins and put on my bib

Wheelin' and dealin'

I make a little bit of stealing

I'll bring her back to the place

and your dress I'm peeling

Your body's on time and your mind is appealing

Staring at the cracks up there up on the ceiling

Such and such'll be the bass that I'm throwing

I'm talking to the girl telling her

I'm all-knowing

She's talking to the kid (who?)

to the kid, to the kid

I'm telling her every lie

that you know that I never did

Hey ladies, get funky

The ladies, the ladies

Well, me in the corner

with a good looking daughter

I dropped my drawers,

said welcome back Kotter

We was cutting up the rug,

she started cutting up the carpet

In my apartment, I begged her, please stop it

And that girl ain't nothing but a crab

Educated no, stupid yep

And when I say stupid, I mean stupid fresh

I'm not James at fifteen or Chachi in charge

I'm Adam and I'm adamant about living large

With the white sassoons and the looks that kill

Makin' love in the back of my Coupe De Ville

I met a little cutie

she was all hopped up on zootie

I liked the little cutie

but I kicked her in the bootie

'Cause I don't kinda go for that messin' around

You be listening to my records' a number one sound

Just step to the rhythm, step, step to the ride

I've got an open mind

so why don't you all get inside?

Tune in, turn on to my tune that's live

Ladies flock like bees to a hive

Hey ladies, get funky

Hey, hey, hey, hey, ladies

One more time, ain't it funky now?

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey ladies

(Ain't it funky now?) well, you know that

She'll show you a good time

then she'll show you the door

Break up with your girl it ended in tears

Vincent Van Gogh go and mail that ear

Call her in the middle of the night

when I'm drinking

The phone booth on the corner

is damp and it's stinking

Said come on over it was me that she missed

I threw that trash can through her window

'cause you know I got dissed

Your old lady left you and you went insane

You blew yourself up in the back of the six train

Take my advice at any price a gorilla

like your mother is mighty weak

Sucking down pints until I didn't know

Woke up in the morning with a one-ton ho

'Cause I announce I like girls that bounce

With the weight that pays about a pound per ounce

Girls with curls and big long locks

And beatnik chicks just wearing their smocks

Walking high and mighty like she's number one

(She thinks she's the passionate one)

Hey ladies, get funky

Good god

Baby, baby, baby, baby

Ain't it funky brother?

Hey, hey, hey, hey ladies

Hey ladies